Merry-go-round Memories

To my sister:

As I sat at the park watching two young girls giggle, I thought of our carefree, childhood days together. The minute they roused the merry-go-round, it brought back memories of our lively laughter at the world swirling around us. We clenched the metal bars, balancing until we ultimately stopped. Stable ground only lasted momentarily, as we would spin again and again.

I was suddenly flush with emotions, both fondness and sadness, knowing at times we have still been spinning together, but occasionally we have not. Our relationship from those childhood days has changed. We have shared stability of the ground – too infrequently. From sisterhood to motherhood, life has spun us in different ways. But all through the whirly ride, you have been a constant in my life. We have shared a kaleidoscopic of experiences together. I have come to be grateful for both our highs and lows.

Our differences have divided us. However, I have come to understand that they have also made us need each other. As we have matured, these variances have helped shape our relationship and understanding of ourselves. Oftentimes, we have both expressed difficulty in finding others who understand us. The people who enter our lives often tend to criticize our crazy ways. Perhaps this is why our desire for solitude interrupts our sisterhood.

Life appeared less complicated when we were young. Our days of imaginary play have become years of reality. The merry-go-round of life has spun us away from each other several times, yet here we are on stable ground together. The similarity in our storylines has allowed us to reframe our experiences and heal together.

If my lack of empathy and compassion hurt you, I am sorry. If I could have chosen to be your sister instead of your mother figure after dad died – I would have chosen to be your sister – every time. It is moving forward from this present moment which allows me to relish our times together. We jointly symbolize what it means to withstand life’s whirls and twirls.

We are genetically tangled. We can never be separated.

It would be selfish not to mention what you have taught me. You continue to carve out a space in this world that showcases your artistry and your endless talents as a sister and a friend. You always tackle situations with a sensible approach. This is a quality I admire and strive to replicate in my own life. Seldom do I see you unravel or lose your composure. It is your ability to be present and enjoy the moment that reminds me to stay focused on what matters most. I have learned to be an improved listener because of your insight. Anyone that doesn’t take the time to understand the depth of you is foolish.

I wish you constant happiness and success in everything that you do. I look forward to watching you blossom into a stunning flower that is finally given proper sunlight. Don’t allow weeds to pull you down – reach to heights unknown. Next time you see two little girls near a merry-go-round, think of us.

Cheers to continued courage, love and being amazing you. I leave you with a quote from Shakespeare, “Though she be but little, she is fierce.”

Your sister for life

© Shannon Hogan Cohen 2015


First Published at Life As A Human on October 31, 2015

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